DIALOGUE AND INFORMATION MANAGEMENT

DIALOGUE AND INFORMATION MANAGEMENT

Cornelius Afebu Omonokhua

We live in a world of tales and rumours, hence before we accept any form of information, we should be able to reflect and determine if what we have heard is true, good or useful. When I was a parish priest, some people would come to tell me all sorts of stories about others. Very often, the informant would say: Please, what I am telling you is confidential. Reflecting on the principle that the ordinary minds discus people, simple minds discus events and great minds discuss ideas, I tried my best to ask myself, “Is this information really for me?” “What do I do with this information? Very often, some of the information I was given needed some management at the level of discernment.

One day, a woman who often comes to my office to tell tales about her colleagues came with very damaging news about the president of her society. I asked her, would you like me to call the accused so that you can say these things in her presence? She replied, “It is meant to be confidential but I do not mind”. I sent for the accused woman who has been presented to me as a “devil incarnate.” When she arrived, I told the informant to repeat her story. I was shocked that she was telling a completely opposite story, and now praising the woman she had earlier destroyed, Fortunately I had the tape of what she had said and I played it back to her in the presence of the accused and she fell on her knees begging the colleague and saying that she was tempted by the devil to tell lies against her.

Any information that is not well managed can destroy a whole community or an institution. If we are interested in listening to gossips or tales and acting on the information, we make those living with us or working with us become insecure and remain suspects as long as we keep saying: “I heard that…” “I was told that….” As a matter of fact, matured and secure people do not talk or act that way. It is worse when leaders and ministers behave like that and even act on anonymous letters. Very often those who say, “They say”, “I heard” betray their own ignorance and insecurity and will end up causing confusion in the communities and institutions they manage; so let us heed the Word of God: “Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble” (Proverbs 21, 23). It is therefore very important to “Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit (Psalm 34, 13). If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless (James 1, 26).  For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit (1 Peter 3, 10). 

In information management, the tongue must be properly controlled to reflect the character and integrity of the owner. It can be very embarrassing when some pastors because they have the opportunity and privilege to mount the pulpit dish out to the congregation the gossips they have pleasantly listened to. Some use the information they got from uncertified and unverified sources to insult people on the pulpit. It is worse when the preacher is speaking against people of other religions with the intention of causing religious acrimony. The mark of a gentle and self-confident person depends to a large extent on the ability to control the manner of speech as prayed by the psalmist: “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips” (Psalm 141, 3)! Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits (Proverbs 18, 21).

In dialogue, information reflects the temperament of a person. How we react to the information can to some extent define the content of our character and maturity. Even dreams and visions have to be subjected to matured reasoning, examination and a critical testing of the spirit because some people may be manipulated by evil spirits in the form of dreams and visions. Even in dogmatic theology dreams and visions are not articles of faith; at best they can be treated as private opinions that must not be imposed on others. Consequently, dreams and visions are not relevant in jurisprudence because they do not pass the rules of logic.  

There is information that is a privileged knowledge.  Even if the information is true, the question is whether the information is useful for the community or the institution or to the people who are receiving it.  Must the information be used, and if so to what extent and to what end? It is only “the truth shall set you free”. However, the intention of the informant should always be evaluated. Supposing you are in charge of formation and training of people, how do you manage the information the students tell you about themselves and others. Let us assume that you are aware that a person has committed adultery, do you need to go and tell the partner? If you do, what will be your intention and motive? Would you be happy if your information (truth) leads to divorce; and disintegrate the family including the innocent children?  Will telling the truth here, lead to freedom or destroy the purpose of freedom? According to the sages God is always willing to bring the sinner to repentance: “You taught your people, by these deeds, that those who are righteous must be kind; and you gave your children reason to hope that you would allow them to repent of their sins (Wisdom 12: 19).”

A dialogue and information manager should be able to control the level of dialogue and strategy that can help bring about the intended consequences of positive building in relationship. This may include the courage and the skill of identifying the reason for the information, the intention of the informant and what he or she hopes to achieve. Ask yourself if the informant wants something from you and would want to destroy someone else to get what he or she wants by gossiping about other people. Also ask yourself if you have become a lover of gossips, or you enjoy listening to people who bring you all kinds of tales about others. This can help you define your identity and maturity in dialogue and information management. Some people have turned themselves into information machines whereby the speech is converted to plain text by the system’s input recognizer/decoder and simply executed like an output robot or avatar. It is not everything that the eyes see that the mouth must say. “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear “(Ephesians 4, 29).

The most successful warrior in the world is a person who has the capacity to conquer his or her own temperaments. “We all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. Know that whatever comes out of your mouth speaks of yourself first, and then to others, who will judge you by your words. It is said that it is not the person who insults the King at his back that is killed, but the one who relays the insults to the King. Therefore, be careful of how you manage information and dialogue.

Fr. Prof. Cornelius Afebu Omonokhua is the Director of Mission and Dialogue of the Catholic Secretariat of Nigeria, Abuja; and Consultor of the Commission for Religious Relations with Muslims (C.R.R.M), Vatican City (comonokhua@hotmail.com).